Take Care of Your Star Player

I believe it is innate in us as humans to be compassionate, kind and generous. There are some of us who extend our gratitude exuberantly while others are stubborn to bend. I like to think I am generous and I hope my peers think the same. However, there is a fault to being too nice. This can be dangerous as it has the ability to cause stress inflict strife and entertain conflict. As adults we often know what we should do in matters of stress we just lack the courage to yield to truth with the potential of bruising the emotions of others. 

For the past 4 months I have been over zealous with the benefits of my employment. Sharing is caring and this is a virtue most of us learn in kindergarten. But when sharing becomes a burden this is when it gets crucial to stand your ground. For myself, as an only child I have always been quick to give, strong to yield and warm in welcoming. I believe it best to treat others as you would want to be treated so it is my nature to do what I can to show my gratitude and be loyal to those I care about. It's taken me a while to understand  I am my worst enemy in terms of being too generous in over extending myself to others. Understanding the value of saying no is something I still grapple with. Along with putting myself first before I set out to take care of others. Therefore, I believe it crucial to take care of your "Star Player"  which is yourself. If your like me, this can be a challenge but it is necessary for perseverance of sanity and healthy maturation. 

So I leave you with this final note, have the courage to say NO, be unyielding with the space and time reserved to take care of you and be kind and loyal to those who treat you the same while respecting that sometimes you must stand your ground. 

Song of this post:  Beautiful Life by Chuck Brown

Full Circle

Full Circle

"allow life to bring you full circle"

The turtle is back! After a long but needed (hibernation)/employment sabbatical I am back and better than ever. I must confess I think I may be even giddy. There’s so much I am grateful for and I am excited to bring the turtle back! This is the first time in a long time I’ve felt Free. Free to me is not just being able to do what you want to do but being able of being your Full Self. It’s rather refreshing to not allow “little” (out of my control) things to stress me out and to wake up every day with joy in my heart. My happiness comes from being able to finally be self sufficient thanks to being newly hired. Its ahmazing what a difference having stability has done to my perspective on life. This time last year I was depressed, dismal and pessimistic. It took great patience for me to let go and allow God to bless me with my new season. I say all that to say that it is vital to take some time to reflect and come full circle on all that life has given you. Being grateful for your current season has the potential to reward you new perspective, outlook and positivity on what is in store for you. Allow life to bring you full circle. I recite this daily, “I am grateful, I am happy and full of joy”. I also believe in surrounding myself in positivity and good energy. When I sense bad energy I make it a priority to distance myself from situations, people, and circumstances that have the potential to bring me bad energy and unnecessary stress. In my early 20’s I was terribly stressed about life, (mainly) love and other things and now I value myself so much more that I don’t  allow negative energy to thrive in my life. Lastly, once you learn to love yourself with so much vigor it becomes easier to let go and let God which results in a stress free life. Come full circle with me and just be!

Sincerely, 

 

The Burgeoning Turtle

Song of this post: Beautiful by Mali Music

 

   Congratulations! Now What? 

Advice for a recent graduate

It is peak graduation season nationwide and graduates are in a frenzy to enter into the "real world". This year I've had multiple family members graduating and I am so proud! Now is the time to celebrate your accomplishments, revel in your success and celebrate the hard work you put in to earn your title as a graduate but after all the fun is over, then what? Some of you have planned your next move which may be a job right out of college or you may be preparing for your freshman year in college for this fall. Either way, now is the time figure out what your next move with be and how that will position you closer to your goals. When I graduated a few years ago, I was given a few books that helped me in my direction of discovering what I wanted to do next. I was the graduate who did not have a clear plan for what was next for me. Thus, I was motivated to write this blog because I want to applaud all the 2014 graduates and extend some advice to you along with some suggested reading. If you do not have a set plan as to what will be next for your life I want to be one of the few that say. That is Okay. No, really it is okay that you may not know what your next move will be. If you are a high school graduate there is plenty of time to decide weather you want to pursue college or possibly cater to other options.

 If you are a college graduate, perhaps you did not get your dream job or did not get into the graduate school you desired and you did not have a plan b. It is not the end of the world. There is still time to get a summer internship or volunteer position at a organization that can help you in the long run. Simply put, there are so many opportunities out there such as Peace Corps, AmeriCorps, Green Corps, and City Year. These opportunities are beneficial in many ways as they provide one with experience, education and time to figure out what may be best for you and your career options. In addition, most of them provide stipends for you to live off of while you serve as a volunteer. These are just a few programs to consider as you make your transition into the real world. So again, congratulations and welcome to the real world, please tread cautiously.

Books you should read

"Congratulations! Now What?" by Bill Cosby

"I Just Graduated....Now What?" by Katherine Schwarzenegger

"Oh the Places You'll Go" by Dr. Seuss


Sincerely,

The Burgeoning Turtle


Song of this post: Wear Sunscreen Song

ALWAYS HUSTLING

Hustling Tips for the Young Professional

In the past 9 years I've lived in 6 cities from a minimum of 4 months to the maximum of 2 years. It's been no easy feat and I certainly did not plan for my early twenties to be like this. However, as life often has it, we make plans and God laughs. 4 out of the 6 places I moved to was because of my academic ambitions. So its safe to say I enjoy  the world of academia and being a student. Through my traveling I have seen a lot, learned a lot and enjoyed the experiences a new city brings. Through my journeys it as not always been feast sometimes it was famine. With that said, this blog post will be about all the ways I (legally) made quick money so that I could eat, have shelter and money for public transportation or gas. First I will share the cities I lived in and list the hustling tips for a young professional. 

 6 Cities

Saint Louis, Missouri
Fresh out of high school, I was eager to move to Saint Louis. The 2 years I spent in this city polished me into a well groomed student and young lady. A great place to visit is "The Loop" there are great eateries, shopping and sites to see! In the spring time Forest Park is gorgeous and in the summer time there are always FREE Jazz concerts. This is a funky, eclectic town and I thoroughly enjoyed living here.

Atlanta, Georgia
Home of civil rights legacy, Atlanta is a unique experience. If visiting the Martin Luther King historic site to enjoying the festivities of the "Sweet Auburn Festival" Atlanta is fun and festive place to live. There is always something to do in the city of Atlanta.

Tunis, Tunisia
While in Tunisia I was a study aboard student with the School for International Training (SIT). This north African paradise is a hidden gem. From the beautiful beaches to the delicious cuisine, Tunis is the place to be. My fondest experiences in Tunisia were camping and camel back riding in the Sahara Desert. This mediterranean destination should be on everyone's bucket list.

Bryan, Texas

This was the most friendliest town to live in. The people of Bryan are kind, generous and family oriented. Living here I saw and reaped the benefits of living in a small town. People care for each other, respect each other more and actually know their neighbors. As a major attraction, Texas A&M University is next door in Bryan's sister city College Station aka "Aggieland" home the aggies.

Brattleboro, Vermont

The most beautiful place I have ever lived. If you like nature and can endure cold winters, Vermont is the place to be! I lived on in the woods on top of a hill overlooking a valley so I thoroughly reveled in the scenery and  exercised by going on nature walks and hiking in the woods.

Washington, D.C

To say this place is a professional city is an understatement. While living here I learned how to network, be assertive and ultimately sell myself. Most my days were full of job interviews and I did that so much it almost felt like a sport. The best things about DC are the museums,  riding the metro (for the people watching) and the awesome accessibility of getting anywhere without a car.

Hustling Tips

Craigslist

This website is beneficial in so many ways. From city to city you can find long term or short term work, housing, stuff for sale, etc. While, living in Washington, DC I was avidly seeking work in International Development but while in the hustle of securing a professional job I had to make money to survive. So, every week I would peruse Craigslist for weekend events I could work for. Often, these were brand ambassador positions. However, this can be anything from being a server at a catered event to handing out water at a marathon. There is always events going on during the weekend in major cities who are looking for a few extra hands to assist and sometimes you get paid in cash! 

Secret Shopping

While living in Texas, I worked as a Apartment Mystery Shopper for Ellis, Inc. This position enabled me to travel throughout Texas pretending to be a potential tenant for various housing establishments. This is good money and a great way to see a lot of nice apartments. Every time I was in a new city of Texas, I made sure I scheduled a mystery shop. You schedule when you want to work so it works around your schedule. 

Freelance Work

As a young professional, I believe there is always room to improve skills and gain new skills. While living in DC, I would dub myself as a ultimate hustler. For extra money, I did hair(braiding), did temporary administrative work and served as a research assistant for a sole proprietorship. In addition, while in Atlanta, I served a bookkeeper for a family who would hire me to work on the weekends. During this time I was a student so this job was just what I needed.  As a young professional I'm always finding ways to improve my skills to make myself more marketable. It's all about who knows you (networking) and the quality of your work. 

Social Media Management

As a graduate student in Brattleboro, Vermont. I was a Social Media Manager for  Easter Seals East Texas. This nonprofit organization was gracious enough to employ me to manage their social media. I spent my weekends doing homework and social media work.  Social media work is wonderful because it allows you to work via the internet. I believe this is one of the coolest jobs there is since you can do it remotely! As another benefit, it enhances your marketing skills, writing skills, branding skills, and overall creativity.


Sincerely,

The Burgeoning Turtle



Song of this post: Hustlin' by Rick Ross

Live and Learn

Don't let your past thwart your future. 

Two years ago I was thrown out of my apartment. A place I called home for a year and half is where I collected all of my personal belongings in a matter of 10-15 minutes and this is where my shame began.  I was living in Texas, in a town where I had No Family and very few friends. At the time, I was hopeless, depressed and homeless. The day I was thrown out, I scraped the money I had and managed to secure a cheap motel room for the night. That night, I stayed up all night uncomfortably surrounded by luggage and boxes of my stuff. I felt I had reached rock bottom or at least I thought this is what it must feel like. The stench of cigarettes and alcohol permeated the room from the previous guest and all I could think of was.. what will I do next? I only had enough money for one night. The next day I made phone calls to the few friends I had hoping they would help me in my time of need and desperation. To lighten my load I walked to the near by Goodwill to donate some of my things so that if I did have to spend the night on the streets the next day I would at least have a lighter load to carry. 

As a blessing, my first angel  came in the form of a new friend I had recently met at a local networking event. I barely knew this person but they embraced me as if I were there own. They managed to get me a really nice hotel room for the next two nights and I was forever grateful. During this time I was too ashamed to contact my family until my two night stay was up. My last day in the hotel I mustered up the courage to email my cousin in a last plea for help. 

In this email, I laid myself bare detailing the last 72 hours of my life. To my refuge, my cousin came to the rescue and the next day I was scheduled to be picked up and driven to the nearest biggest city. Later that day I checked out of the hotel and my friend picked me up and drove me to a nearby gas station where I was to be picked up by another friend who let me sleep on their couch that night. The next day I was picked up early in the morning by strangers who were my 3rd God sent angels. As we drove away from this small town in Texas, I emotionally said goodbye not knowing if I would ever see this place again. 

The next week I spent with a family that were warm, welcoming and very loving. They loved me without knowing me nor did they judge me. That week I gained a new family who I am forever indebted to. I share this with you not to just relive what I deem a traumatic experience but to express that from this past experience there is a lesson to be learned. That lesson I now have learned and matured from. This type of experience heavily decreased my confidence but also taught the value of things I did not value before. I believe it is amazing how a positive can be birthed from a negative situation just like a phoenix rises from the ashes that represents the flames of another phoenix. It is essential that people value others but most importantly value themselves. Self love is the first step in understanding your worth and value and once you are in love with who you are then love for others will be easier to give and sustain. 

For those of you still reliving traumatic experiences that you believe have altered the course of your life. Refrain from allowing it to thwart your progress. Put your your past in a bubble and kiss it to the sky thanking the universe for that experience because now you know better and can do better. 

Sincerely, 

The Burgeoning Turtle

Song of this post: Breathe by Floacist

Be Open

A Yielding Ambition

"Don't be stingy with your yields, nor boastful in your reaping or sorrowful in your season." 

Recently I watched "Dreams of a Life" a  riveting documentary about an extraordinary yet sad story about Joyce Vincent a woman who lived a  life of social splendor yet of mystery. She became famous because she was found deceased in your apartment 3 years after she passed away. So this story is all but ordinary. The main question is, how can someone die and nobody inquire about their whereabouts? What about her family? friends? There really is no answer just perceptions and assumptions and lasting memories of the who she was. 

I find myself so intrigued by this story because after watching this documentary, I learned that I can relate to Ms. Vincent in a unique way. As a natural introvert and self alienating person I find myself secluding myself from friends and family. I suppose this stems from being reared as an only child always playing and being by myself. I'm not sure how to identify it. However, the life of Ms. Vincent brought to light the perils of living a life as a secret recluse and the ultimate consequence of literally dying alone. 

So I write this blog because I was moved to share this sad yet beautiful story about this woman who was the life of the party with fabulous friends but somewhere deep inside was unhappy. I say unhappy because how can you shut everyone out your life and still be fully happy and content with yourself? It fascinates me how we as people are labeled as introverts or extroverts. I marvel at the innate social skills of extroverts in awe of their ability to as some say "move in a room full of roaches". Perhaps it is intimidation I harbor that thwarts me from stepping up to anyone and striking a conversation. Or perhaps being introverted is what makes me the profound thinker I am. Whatever the case, after learning of Ms. Vincent's life, I believe it more pertinent to be more vulnerable in being open to the world and not so reclusive. What happened to dismissing shame and being transparent about how you feel? There is a time and place for everything, however its okay sometimes to speak how you feel and share that with the world. As we age some of our friendships dwindle and the older you get the more you appreciate the fondness of family friends  so why not enjoy these relationships all the time? 

Lastly, if you love someone or if you are scared to say or show your emotions, now is the time to express how you feel. All to often we keep inside our true feelings and when you look back on your life there may be regrets, shame and guilt. Our time is short here on earth so make the most of it and be yourself OPENLY. 

Song of this post: Violet Hill by Coldplay 

Sincerely, 

The Burgeoning Turtle 

 

Happy New Year

Home Again

For the holiday season I came back home to Los Angeles California. Being home is a bitter sweet experience for me. Don’t get me wrong it’s great to be home again but sometimes being home sets in an unproductive attitude for me. I believe I’ve been away from home for so long now that I am at my best when I am away. Plus I have not been home since March 2013 and being home again reminds me of why I left in the first place…to pursue more economic opportunity and attain employment. The optimist in me reminds me that Los Angeles is not a bad place and people can prosper here. But my spirit tells me this is not the place I am supposed to be right now. Now that my journey has come full circle and I am home still seeking employment I’ve learned your journey is what you make of it. And that going home does not mean that you have failed. Some of us feel at our best at home in the comforting confides of our parents home. But for others we thrive and feel stronger out in the world working towards our ambitions. So I continue this journey in believing it’s okay to go home and recharge even though it’s not the place you want to be right now, perhaps it’s the place you need to be to get you to the place you want to be. I’m Home Again. 

Song of this post: Home Again by Michael Kiwanuka

Sincerely, 

The Burgeoning Turtle